Zha Cai Fried Rice.
It's literally fried rice with stir-fried zha cai.
There are two ways to make it.
One is to fry the rice first, then stir-fry the zha cai separately.
Then you arrange it on top of the plated rice.
The other is to toss the zha cai in while you're frying the rice and stir-fry them together.
What ends up on the plate is rice with zha cai mixed throughout.
Personally, I like the latter better.
The former looks nicer, but when everything's mixed in well like the latter, it tastes way better.
"Why zha cai fried rice of all things?"
There's shrimp fried rice, crab fried rice, and all sorts of others.
Why go with zha cai fried rice, which is even more obscure than kimchi fried rice?
"What's wrong, Wof? What's this zha cai fried rice? Now I'm curious."
"Well... there's no zha cai in this world, so..."
"Hm... something similar... does exist, you know."
"But that's not zha cai. Zha cai fried rice really needs actual zha cai to work."
"...I suppose... that's true."
"What even is zha cai?"
"It's like a spicy pickled vegetable. You make it from the root of a plant called zha cai."
I was pretty sure zha cai was a mutation of brown mustard, a member of the brassica family.
The root of that plant was what zha cai was made from.
Whether anything like that existed in this world was anyone's guess.
"I have no idea what any of that means."
"There's still some paste left, so why don't you try it?"
"Very well. I suppose I'll give it a go."
Hayarn popped the green paste into his mouth.
His eyes went wide.
"Is this rice? How strange... is it rice?"
"It tastes like fried rice."
"With some kind of weird spiciness mixed in — what in the world is this!? Why does this paste taste like rice? It's uncanny. How is this so uncanny!?"
Well, yeah.
I'd felt something similar myself.
Having that paste be all gooey and sludgy while tasting like zha cai fried rice was honestly enough to make your brain short-circuit.
"The others are... hmm. I'm not sure about eating those."
What a waste, but I had zero desire to touch the rest of the green paste.
"If that's the case... then... fine... Riv will... eat them."
"Sorry. Mine too, if you would."
"...Leave it to me..."
Riv, dependable as always.
Riv eating away with gusto.
"How is it?"
"Mmm… this is… offal… stew…"
"How would you know that?"
"This black one of mine…"
"…Tacos…"
"And the yellow one?"
"…………I don't know… it's kind of sticky…"
"Excuse me, can I have a bit?"
I took a small portion and tried it.
"This is seasoned seaweed."
So how would she know that!?
What kind of lineup and choices are these?
Even so, I had a question.
"This is your main meal…?"
I mean, I had a vague image of space food being like this, but this was really pushing it.
"Mmm… no… way… check the vending… machines… carefully…"
"Check carefully— oh!"
There it was in big bold letters: CRAZY SPACE FOOD. And below that: BIG-BIG CRAZY.
I got it in an instant. So that's what kind of vending machines they were! Damn it all!
"What's that. What kind of thing is in a vending machine?"
"This is a joke food vending machine."
"What did you say? A joke? Why does something like that even exist?"
"Hmm... paste meals are... the romance of space..."
"What did you say?"
No wonder I thought something was off.
In my memories from my past life, drinks with unknown flavors and such were sold in vending machines too.
And this was the bento version of that — and a joke at that. Paste and all.
But that doesn't change the fact that the lineup was way too niche.
Hayarn made a pained face.
"Then what about the main food?"
"Those were... normal... beefsteak... ramen... curry rice... beefsteak... and so on... they had those."
"So basically not that different from us?"
"Mmm... I guess... that's... right..."
"So that's why there's a joke vending machine like this?"
"...Something like that..."
What do you mean, "something like that."
Hayarn murmured under his breath.
"The appearance was the worst, but the taste was incredible... it was delicious, though."
That was true — the taste really was incredible. On par with the real thing, and delicious to boot.
It was paste, but the taste was beyond complaint. Truly worthy of technology that had expanded all the way to space.
But I really wished they wouldn't use paste to demonstrate that, and I hadn't wanted to find out this way either.
I'd have preferred a more dynamic demonstration with some actual space to show off.
After that, Riv finished eating, took a short break, and went off to search for the next vending machine.
The goal was carbonation — but specifically, carbonated energy drinks.
"There are hardly any vending machines around here."
"There are all sorts of interesting things, though. By the way, this may be a bit late to ask, and I apologize for the presumptuousness, but — Lady Riv, are you a(n) [Saint]?"
Hayarn suddenly came out with that.
It felt like a calculated question, timed to catch her off guard.
"A Saint?"
"I've actually visited a sacred site of the Seihou religion before. There, I met a woman who looked remarkably like you. She possessed knowledge of transcendent technology. She was a [Saint]."
"Huh, someone who looks just like Riv."
Pakira-san also had a 2P-color version with Yomid-ou.
So Riv had one too, apparently. A 2P-color.
"…………"
"Riv?"
"Mm… Riv is… Riv… not that kind of lullaby Saint… no… nothing…"
"I see. A rude question. I apologize."
The rabbit bowed in apology.
Huh. Apologizing without getting roped in first — that was unusual for Hayarn.
Riv gave a small shake of the head.
"Mm... it's fine... if you think of Riv as... something like... Wof... who knows... various things... that's... good enough..."
"I see. Got it. Something like Wof, then."
"You clearly know more than I do, Riv."
"Mm... there aren't many... vending machines... here..."
"Riv?"
"...let's... go that way..."
"Hey—!"
She ignored me. A little pushy, wasn't she?
Well, whatever.
"Hm? What's that?"
"That's—"
As we kept searching, a shop appeared tucked against the wall.
A store. Looked like a convenience store.
"Let's check it out."
"Is that safe?"
"It's just a convenience store."
"A convenience store?"
"Ah, think of it like a general store."
Convenience stores didn't exist in Hayarn's era, huh.
Carbonated drinks existed, but this was still a pretty confusing era.
I stepped inside, and the automatic doors slid open with a little chime.
Oh, right, right. A convenience store.
"Huh, it's... kind of normal?"
I had assumed it would be all futuristic and sleekly functional.
But the convenience store was exactly like the ones from my past life.
First there was a magazine corner, and seeing paper magazines lined up there gave me a small jolt.
"Hm? Riv, this fashion magazine—"
What kind of futuristic fashion would it be?
I was excited, but—on the cover were women and men in hopelessly outdated outfits.
Ugh. Not what I expected.
"Mm. Magazines, huh. Brings back memories."
So Hayarn's era had magazines too.
An even more confusing era than I thought.
"Setting that aside, why are all these outfits so old-fashioned?"
"Those are... from the classic boom... magazines..."
"Classic... boom?"
"In the impossibly... long... journey through space... there were... several... classic booms... along the way..."
Classic booms.
I'd heard that trends tend to come full circle eventually.
A retro boom had come around several times in my past life's memories too.
Probably. It must have been an impossibly long journey.
During that time, people's lives and trends stayed on the cutting edge, yet they grew nostalgic in this way too.
I get it somehow. I understand.
On the other product shelves, I saw familiar items displayed.
Onigiri. Sandwiches. Side dishes. There were bento boxes too.
The variety was rich, and they looked normally delicious.
Riv said they were preserved permanently, so it should be fine to eat them.
For now, though, I'd hold off.
And then I spotted the energy drinks lined up neatly in the drink aisle we were looking for.
"Ooh, so this is an energy drink. There are a lot of them."
A rabbit hops.
I was overwhelmed. From the top of the drink shelf to the bottom, everything was an energy drink.
Not only that, but the shelf next to it was packed with energy drinks too.
Seriously? It was the energy drink corner.
"There are this many kinds..."
"Hmm... down the ages... energy drinks... a great collection... almost... every... flavor... exists."
"Down the ages... energy drinks..."
How many past generations were we talking about?
There were quite a few I didn't recognize.
I see. By my past life's memories, it's weird, but apparently that's the future.
And right now it's infinitely the past.
Somehow the whole timeline felt jumbled, and I had this strange sense about it.
"Miss Riv, am I free to pick whatever I like here?"
"...Okay...as much as you want...refills are fine too..."
"R-Refills too?"
"Mm...allow it...today...I'm permitting it..."
"Awesome!"
"Energy drinks aren't good in excess, though."
But I did want a few for testing purposes.
I picked out several energy drinks and also grabbed some snacks.
Haiyan was being greedy too, piling quite a number into the basket.
But do you even understand whose pouch you're stuffing those into?
And don't make Riv carry your stuff just because you can't hold it yourself.
Then, in front of the register, Riv placed her hand on it.
It beeped, and an automated voice chimed, "Thank you for your purchase."
"Well then, let's head home."
"Huh?! Wof! What do you mean, head home?!"
I already knew it, but sure enough, Haiyan was against it.
"Mm...there are lots of sightseeing spots..."
Unexpectedly, Riv also piled on.
But it was no good.
"I get that it's tempting, but completing our objective comes first. I understand the appeal, and honestly, I'd love to explore to my heart's content too. But with something this large, who knows how many days it would take. Besides, we haven't told anyone anything, so they'll worry if we don't come back. We'd be causing trouble."
"That's true, but—"
"Besides, wouldn't that just defeat the whole purpose?"
I understood how they felt. That was exactly why I had to show restraint.
"W-well... that's true, but..."
"Akindura and Anstanshiru. And everyone else—they'd be absolutely livid. If things go wrong, we wouldn't just get an earful; we'd be thrown back in our cages."
"Guh...!?"
Good, good. It's working.
Back then, this rabbit had snuck out overnight multiple times, causing those two a lot of worry.
I'd heard that, as a lesson, they'd put her in a cage and forced her into supervised living.
Honestly, even I got chills listening to those two recount the story with such glee.
It was fine since she was a rabbit, but for a normal person that would be kidnapping and imprisonment. Then again, since it was Haiyan, it didn't really matter.
"Besides, it's not like we can never come back. Next time, we'll bring more people, prepare properly, and then explore."
"Mm... and that time... we could stay over... hotel... living... immersion."
We could stay at a hotel? That actually sounded interesting.
Anyway, setting that aside, I pressed the point with the hesitant-looking rabbit.
"Haiyan. You're a grown adult, understand?"
"Guuh... g-g-gii...! F-fine... let's head back."
Well, well. Looks like he finally understood.
Haiyan then turned to face Riv.
"...I'd like to form an investigation team soon and conduct a proper survey. Of course, it'll be carried out with strict information management and control, limited to those involved. When that time comes, Miss Riv — would you cooperate?"
"Mm... if I'm free..."
"I'd appreciate that."
"However... I'd like to impose... restrictions on what... you take from here. In this day and age... destroying the world... would be... very... unpleasant..."
"I feel the same way."
I feel the same way too.
I can't let a sword-and-magic fantasy turn into sci-fi.
If that happens, I'll make this rabbit into a full-course appetizer.
I swear solemnly.
And so, we returned safely.
Back at the den, I parted ways with Riv and Haiyan.
I sat on the bed and let out a tired breath.
Then, almost unconsciously, I looked up at the ceiling before dropping my gaze to the can in my hand.
There was a Bloody Cola in the vending machine.
I bought another one, but... looking at the gold can and the distinctive red lettering in my hand.
"Bloody Cola, huh?"
Bloody Cola — from the memories of my past life.
And Bloody Cola, from the vending machine aboard the space colonization ship.
What could this mean?
Well, I might find out once I do a proper investigation.
Even if I don't, it's not like my life is going to change.
More importantly, even as a joke, the pickled-vegetable fried-rice flavored paste was brutal.
This is exactly what they mean by your brain bugging out.
Brain rot.
No, not quite.
"Fried rice, huh."
Alright. Maybe I'll make it for tonight's dinner for the first time in a while.
The eight years of experience from my past life working at a busy neighborhood Chinese restaurant were itching to be put to use.
That evening.
Before I knew it, I was standing in a mysterious all-white space with fog rolling in.
"Ah..."
Come to think of it, didn't I recently break two knives?
Man, it's been a while since I've been here either — I was thinking to myself, casually, when I sensed a presence.
A supremely mysterious beauty with a flash and gleam like a blade appeared before me in an instant.
Right. The knife goddess. Yep.
—————————————
This is sudden, but I have an announcement about a new work.
It's sci-fi, and the protagonist is a middle-aged man.
Simply put, it's the story of a washed-up information broker living in the slums of a stereotypically cyberpunk dystopian world who turns out to be a genuine mage transmigrated from a sword-and-sorcery fantasy—and how that guy more or less holds his own.
"Slum Wizard ~The Dystopian World's Information-Broker Old Guy. Turns Out He's a Real Mage~"
It's not onee-shota, but if you're into stuff like Co○la or Go○u, I definitely recommend it.
I'll be posting in batches by chapter, so there'll be a bit of a wait until the next update.
If any of that sounds interesting to you, I'd really appreciate your support.