Suddenly, I found myself wondering why I was doing this ball-poking thing with a fat Dagaa.
While thinking that, I asked Mineha, who was sipping black bean tea.
"Well, I figured since Dagaa can't move, we've got no choice but to move him ourselves."
"I see."
"But I think I'm gonna lose weight before he does."
"Ha ha ha..."
How much more weight could Mineha possibly lose?
Mineha giggled brightly.
"Still, he's gotten way too fat, hasn't he."
"Yeah, he really has."
"I've been a little worried about how Dagaa hasn't shown up lately, you know."
"He's been a knife the whole time."
For about... a month, I think. Something like that.
You could get this fat in just that long?
As expected, my eyes drifted toward the Azure Saint's Gauntlet on the shelf.
The oversized magic crystal was off, so it was just a dull black.
"What's wrong?"
"I'm painfully aware that finding the root cause is going to be difficult."
The cause of the weight gain was probably inside my own heart.
To get to the truth, I'd have to go inside my own heart.
But I had no idea how to do that.
The only method I knew — the Awakening Water — was off the table now.
"That's true."
"...I suppose I could lose weight with a witch's potion, though."
That was the only option.
"Maybe, maybe not."
Mineha spins the Fatgore around and around.
"Gngh."
What a defiant attitude. That got me a little irritated.
That day, the witch never showed up.
A weight-loss potion. Not something you can just whip up, apparently.
Mineha tucked the Fatgore under her arm and left with it.
She seems to have taken a liking to juggling. Apparently she wants to keep at it a while longer.
Well, I don't really mind, but how long are you going to stay a sphere, Fatgore?
The next day.
I head to Hyzen. The dungeon, naturally.
It turns out Thunder Fang is taking on the Hyzen dungeon.
According to Rel, it's more of a rehabilitation exercise.
Thunder Fang's first outing in months.
Well, since you can't die in this dungeon, I hope they really go all out with the rehabilitation.
I had wanted to observe them doing so.
But I had been summoned to the Hydrangea Delvers' Guild.
At the other counter, the fairial receptionist lady had a few words for me.
—It's genuinely a problem that you haven't taken on a single quest.
—I-I'm sorry about that.
—In principle, a demotion would be in order, but I held off since I heard the circumstances.
—Y-yes.
—So accept one Rank V quest, will you?
—Understood.
I had gone so long without taking any quests that I was on the verge of being demoted.
According to the rules, if you go over three months without accepting a single quest, that's what happens.
It had already been well past three months.
But they had held off, considering the situation with the Hyzen dungeon and all.
What a pain — I stepped away from the counter and stared at the Rank V quest board.
—Hmm. Which one should I pick?
It's kind of... underwhelming. Rank V only has the most underwhelming quests.
Still, the pay isn't bad. So this is what it means to live at Rank V, I guess.
—U-um...
After agonizing over it, I made my decision. This one, then.
The commission was a dungeon gathering quest.
A gathering quest for a specified floor in Hydrangea's dungeon.
The designated floor was the tenth.
What I had to gather was five Sun Grass and five Crescent Moon Grass.
It didn't look like a particularly difficult quest.
Well, you know, it was pretty underwhelming.
"But I guess it's appropriate."
After all, it was Rank V. This was probably about what to expect.
Without further ado, I accepted the commission and headed for Hydrangea's dungeon.
"Well, if it isn't Wof!"
"Gauro."
At the dungeon entrance, a grizzled guard with a scarred face called out to me.
It was Gauro. Before I became a delver, he'd helped me out in various ways.
"Long time no see. I already knew you were doing fine, though."
"You—yep, that's right."
Gauro gave a wry smile.
"Sounds like you've been getting into all sorts of things, huh."
"W-well, I can't exactly deny that..."
"What is it? A quest?"
"Yeah. If I don't take commissions, I'll get demoted, so..."
"Good luck out there."
"Thanks!"
Gauro saw me off, and I entered the Hydrangea dungeon.
It had been a while since I'd been here.
Floor one. I caught sight of the passage leading to the Junkyard.
"Hey. Let's go."
"Wait up!"
"Today's the day we score something to sell, I can feel it!"
Three kids passed by me.
They were heading toward the Junkyard.
"…………"
I watched them go, then headed down to floor two.
No incidents to speak of, and I reached floor ten.
Smooth, or rather, I ran into plenty of monsters, but none of them were a challenge.
I found a few treasure chests, too.
But the contents… finding nothing but an empty bottle left me speechless.
It was practically garbage. I'll use it, though.
Floor ten was a grassland.
A forest stretched out in the back, and the stairs to floor eleven were inside it.
"This is sun grass. And this is crescent grass."
I'd already spotted some, so I got to harvesting.
I explored the grassland. The monsters that showed up were goblins and edge wolves.
Every now and then a big elk would appear too. So giant deer counted as monsters, huh.
"...That makes four sun grass and five crescent grass."
Smooth sailing. Almost boring, really.
"I don't see any other delvers."
There was a teleportation circle that could shortcut you to floor six, so people just skipped this area.
Unless you had a request like mine, you probably wouldn't come in.
"Still, this is basically cheating."
I couldn't help but laugh bitterly to myself.
If I just searched on the Ring of Fortune, everything popped right up on the display.
"Oh, yellow."
Huh. So there was some slightly better quality sun grass deeper in the forest.
I headed into the woods. The ruins ahead had the stairs down to floor eleven.
But floor eleven was shortcutted too, so hardly anyone used this route.
"H-hey!"
"Knock it off!"
What? I heard voices.
I activated Danger Discernment and my breath caught. Three red dots appeared.
But they didn't feel like monsters. I approached cautiously.
"Stop!"
"Don't you go thrashing around!"
*CRACK*... the sound of a blow.
"Aaaaaaahhhh!!"
"Don't you dare fight back, you little—!"
*CRACK THWACK CRACK*... the sounds of beating echoed in succession.
"Ahahahaha, serves you right."
"Can't even handle one woman properly?"
"Shut up. Hey. You. Woman. Brace yourself. I'm gonna teach you your place real good!"
"Please stop... I'm begging you... please stop!"
"Oraaah!"
The instant he swung to strike again, *shluk*,
the
man's
belly
had
a
hole
o
pened
ed.
.
— Wh—!? Who's there?!
— An enemy!
— Slow to react.
I mercilessly shot the remaining two through the head with Ballistic 6.
Once I confirmed they'd fallen, I approached the terrified girl.
— Are you all right?
— Y-yes...
She was a girl. Still, she had to be four or five years older than me.
The tearful girl had torn clothes and a swollen face.
Her body bore the marks of multiple blows.
— Y-you bastard...
— Huh, he's still alive.
The man I'd shot in the gut first was still alive.
He pulled something out with trembling hands and drank it, and the wound on his stomach vanished. Oh, impressive.
Probably a mid-grade potion. It wouldn't be an elixir, though.
The man was a shaved-headed fatso. So fat that his leather armor creaked.
He stood up with effort and drew his sword. A filthy, poorly-maintained saber.
And then the man summoned fire. The saber blazed.
A Relic. Or an OOPArt. Well, doesn't really matter either way.
"Get ready, kid!"
"..."
"What's wrong? Scared stiff and can't say a word?"
"Oh no, I'm just a little bewildered, that's all."
"Huh? What. Even if you beg for your life, I won't show mercy."
"It's not that sort of impossible thing. Um, the fatty flexing in front of me is just so pathetically weak that I'm a bit thrown off."
Yeah, I dunno what to say.
Watching him channel fire into the saber confirmed it—this fatty was absolute trash.
The way these types use their Relics is spectacularly, insufferably boring.
No creativity, no finesse, nothing but the most generic application imaginable.
That reminds me of the way Relics get used.
There was once a hobgoblin that led a pack in the Witch's Forest.
That one was at least several tiers above this fatty when it came to handling a Relic.
In other words, this fatty is trash on the level of a goblin—or worse.
"Huhhhh?! Who the hell are you calling trash?!"
"The fatty standing in front of me. Why, does that bother you? Yeah. You're seriously weak."
"I'll kill yoooouuu!"
Low boiling point, too. I smoothly extend my fist in front of the fatty.
Whether he noticed it or not, the fatty charged in—and ended up with a large crescent-shaped wound across his belly.
It wasn't just that I thrust my fist forward.
What I was holding was Banish shaped into a ring—the Banish Chakram.
Since it's invisible to anyone but me, the fatty who charged in took damage all on his own.
"Gwaaaaaahhhhh?!"
"See? Pathetic."
It was so stupid I could've sighed. Drenched in sweat, the fatty glared at me with murderous intent.
So what.
I casually swept the ring sideways, and the fatty's body split clean in two.
And that's that.
He really was weaker than a goblin. Or rather, his head was the weak part.
After that, I handed the small vial of elixir to the stunned girl.
I urged her to drink, and she slowly brought it to her lips.
"Wait—the pain in my body... it's gone...?"
"Glad to hear it. So what happened here?"
These people. They're delvers, aren't they?
What are they doing in a place like this?